Breaking the Stigma
Too often, I hear someone say, “I just push down my feelings until I burst,” or “Other people have real problems—I’m fine.” Even as conversations about mental health become more common, a quiet stigma remains—especially when it comes to children and teens.
Many parents find themselves torn: They see their child struggling with worry, frustration or self-doubt, and at some point they consider therapy, but there’s often a pause before taking that step. They hesitate, stuck with the thought, “Do they really need it?” or “What will people think?”
At the same time, many kids internalize this same fear. In a culture that often equates talking about feelings with weakness, many young people learn to hide their emotions until they can no longer hold them in, leading to outbursts, withdrawal or frustration. They might wonder, “Does therapy mean something’s wrong with me?” or “What will my friends think?”
The truth is much simpler. Therapy isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s a tool for growth. It’s a place to make sense of feelings, develop coping skills and learn that emotions deserve care, not shame. Just as we bring a child to a doctor for their physical health, therapy gives children and teens a safe space to strengthen their emotional health—something everyone can benefit from.
Where the Stigma Comes From
The stigma around therapy runs deep and often starts with misunderstanding. Many of us grew up in a time when emotions weren’t discussed openly and seeking help for mental health was reserved for crises or for people with “real” problems. Even as the world around us changes and societal conversation about mental wellness increases, those old ideas linger.
Today’s kids and teens live in a world filled with pressures that did not exist years ago: constant academic expectations, social media comparisons and the challenge of balancing it all. It’s no surprise that they may sometimes need extra support. Yet the old message—that needing help equals weakness—remains, making reaching out feel more like a risk than a resource.
Reframing Therapy
The best way to reduce stigma is to normalize therapy as something proactive and healthy, and it starts at home.
Talk about emotions openly: Name your own feelings—“I felt stressed at work today.” When children see adults handle emotions constructively, they learn that feelings are natural and manageable, not something to hide. Naming feelings gives kids and teens language for their inner world, which not only makes big emotions feel less scary, but also helps them communicate more clearly when they need support. Over time, this kind of emotional vocabulary acts as a bridge, making it easier for them to talk openly, whether with a parent, a friend or a therapist.
Highlight role models: Many celebrities and public figures, from Selena Gomez to Michael Phelps, now speak openly about seeing therapists. Sharing these examples can help kids see that even successful, admired people prioritize their mental health.
Change your language: Instead of saying, “You need help,” try “Therapy is a place where you can learn new tools,” This small language shift reframes therapy as growth, not correction.
The Gift of Space
Therapy provides something kids and teens rarely get elsewhere, a place where they can talk freely, without fear of judgment, correction or pressure to please. It’s not about diagnosing every worry or solving every problem—it’s about giving children the tools to understand themselves better, manage their emotions and build resilience.
Sometimes, just knowing there is a safe space to be heard can make a world of difference. And even if therapy isn’t the right fit for a child at a particular moment, normalizing the idea of seeking support helps others. By modeling openness, sharing experiences and reducing shame around emotions, families make it easier for peers, classmates and siblings to feel safe reaching out when they need help.
Moving Forward
The stigma around therapy is slowly shifting, but there is still more work to be done. Parents have a powerful opportunity to reshape how their children view emotional support. By normalizing emotion expression and framing therapy as a tool for learning and growth, families can help children and teens feel safe seeking support. When we talk about therapy the same way we talk about physical health, we send a message that emotions deserve care too.
Because seeking help isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s one of the clearest signs of strength.
Meet the Author
Kaylie Jacobs, LMSW, is a therapist at Collaborative Minds Psychotherapy and specializes in working with children, teens and young adults struggling with anxiety, depression and behavioral challenges. Kaylie is available for in-person sessions in Teaneck or virtual sessions in New Jersey and New York.